How about some New Year’s resolutions to help sport parents and youth coaches make this coming year a success? Now is a good time for reflection on how we can work together to make youth sports better. We tend to get carried away in the heat of competition, and the desire to win can become the only important thing happening.
We all need to adopt the truth that playing sports is about more than winning. I’ll not go into a list of reasons how kids’ lives can be enhanced by athletics. I am asking that adults step back and examine the whole picture about their role in youth sports. Start by looking at the kids’ dreams. Discern what dreams are possible and how they can come true. Find the positive life lessons that can be learned by playing sports.
Dreams can be as simple as wanting to wear a team uniform or as complex as hoping to become a pro. Lessons can include learning respect and handling adversity. Everyone who is a part of athletics has a role to play in making those dreams and lessons happen. Try to appreciate that success comes in many forms, and get a firm grasp on reality. Not every child will thrive in a sport, especially if there is too much pressure to excel. Dreams are secondary to the emotional and physical well-being of children! Sports can be one of the best experiences of childhood if it is positive.
One lesson to be learned from sports is that we have to make changes to improve. We adults have a challenge facing us to reclaim sports for kids as a game they play. Wanting to win is truly important. It fuels the desire to improve. Competition is not a bad thing, but subjecting “losers” to punishment, disgust or ridicule is. Can we define “winners” by criteria in addition to the scoreboard? Consider making the following Resolutions to improve sports for kids.

PARENTS
Refuse to let sports be a full time job for your child.
The current trend seems to be that you should start your child in a sport early (3 years old), get them on as many traveling teams as possible, make them practice often and hard and pressure them to excel. These ideas can actually do more harm than good. Realize that this is not the mini NBA, NFL, MLB or MLS. A child who competes too much risks emotional burnout and physical overuse injuries. More is not necessarily better.
Check the family “fun meter.” Is the athlete happy? Does he/she look forward to practices, lessons and games? Are they afraid to make a mistake? Do they celebrate winning as a team? Can they recover from a loss? Are they eager to keep playing? Do they have breaks from the sport? Do they have other interests? Is the rest of the family having a good time being involved with the sport?  Resolve to remove the stress and increase the fun.

COACHES
Become a double-goal coach.
The Positive Coaching Alliance defines this kind of coach as one who wants to win and also teach positive life lessons. Coaches are such an important person in a child’s life. You are teaching with every comment and expectation. Like it or not, you are also a role model. How you conduct yourself with officials will teach about respecting rules and authority. How you react to mistakes will affect whether your athletes play with fear or confidence.
How you treat your athletes will be your legacy. There are winning coaches in the headlines right now who have been fired because of alleged improper physical or verbal abuse of players. The drill sergeant method of coaching is no longer acceptable, as it once was. You can be demanding and a disciplinarian without being abusive. If you focus on the players, it works wonders with the kids ... and their parents. Keep it positive. Focus on fun. Resolve to be a winning coach in all senses of the word.